Wicked Jeff

Everybody thinks of me as just their fellow neighbor in this crumbling apartment complex. They're not wrong. [[My roommate however, is another story. ]]

It's hard enough to afford an apartment, it's another thing to be in a shitty one with an equally as shitty roommate. I don't actually know his name, his name in my phone is just "wicked jeff". [[Everyday I wake up, ->Choice 1]]

Tired. I always wake up tired, and soon enough have an hours-long migraine throughout the day. That combined with wicked jeff makes me have to leave the house often. But I live here too dammit. Anyways I, [[Go to the bathroom ->br]] [[Go to the kitchen ->k]] [[Go to the living room ->lr]]

I go to the bathroom... Before even thinking about doing anything, hot, damp, air hits my face. It feels suffocating. wicked jeff showered before me and didn't even bother to turn the fan on to air out the steam. This is how we develop mold... All the surfaces are wet and slippery. Ugh. [[I brush my teeth ->brush]] [[toilet. ->toilet]] [[I take a shower ->shower]]

I go to the kitchen... [[I open the fridge ->fridge]]

I go to the living room... [[I try to get some work done ->work]] [[I see my precious pet cat! ->kitty]] [[... I smell something weird ->trash]]

I go to brush my teeth. The sink is *covered* in toothpaste. And tiny black hairs. Not just the basin, but the actual faucet and handles. What the fuck man. I groan and take out some wipes to clean it up. [[Toilet. ->toilet]] [[Shower... ->shower]]

... this asshole didn't put the seat down. Hair got in it too. [[Brush teeth ->brush]] [[Take a shower ->shower]]

I pull the curtain back and take a shower. A cold shower, since my roommate used all the hot water. ... wicked jeff clogged the drain with his hair. [[Change in room ->room]]

Eggs. Condiments. A sole lemon. A THIMBLE OF MILK. I guess I should do grocery shopping, most of what's left has to be thrown out anyways. I take the lemon and peel it. Biting into it, killing me instantly. Not really, it's not plesant though. [[Discard of peel ->sink]]

On my way to the trashcan, in the living room, I briefly glance into the sink. There's eggshells and a nearly full bowl of milk. I want to scream. Instead I gather the eggshells with the peels, and dump the milk out. That'll have to be a conversation for later. [[Throw it out ->trash]]

I pullout my laptop, boot it up, log in, blah blah blah. All is well All is serene. ... ... [[I hear my roommate's grating shriek. ->confront]]

The trashcan is nearly overflowing. It smells stale and ... wet. I can tell wicked jeff put more shit in it based on the new crushed can at the very top, nearly falling out. This asshole dumped the rest of it's contents out into the trash bag instead of pouring it down the sink, recently too. Oh my god dude. Right before my ensuing meltdown, my cat comes sprinting out from some hidden corner, nearly bumping right into the trash. [[I hear my roommate's grating shriek. ->confront]]

My cat comes sprinting out from some hidden corner, nearly bumping right into the trash. I start turning to chase her down and see if she's okay... [[I hear my roommate's grating shriek. ->confront]]

*jeff!* The shrieking does not stop. *JEFF!* It's agitating, it makes my ears ring and I can feel a migraine forming *You asshole! I've-* [[(bring up shower) ->mold1]] [[(bring up trash) ->mold2]]

I go to my room and get changed. I have a few moments of peace before I hear the skittering of paws on the floor, from the living room, and a familiar shriek. [[I go to the living room. ->confront]]

*I've been telling you daily to pick your shit up! I tell you don't let the shower steam up without letting it air out, and you don't listen! Our neighbors had black mold! We probably have black mold! If we don't now, at the rate YOU'RE going, we will! And stop terrorizing my cat!!! ! ! !!!!! !! !* My head is spinning. The shrieking doesn't stop. I'm not sure if he hears me. I'm not even really sure what direction it's coming from. My eyesight blurs, then goes black [[(..........) ->final]]

*I've been telling you daily to pick your shit up! I tell you don't let the trash build up and dump liquid into the bag! It splashes everywhere and you never wipe it up!!! It gets on the drywall!! Our neighbors had black mold! We probably have black mold! If we don't now, at the rate YOU'RE going, we will! And stop terrorizing my cat!!! ! ! !!!!! !! !* My head is spinning. The shrieking doesn't stop. I'm not sure if he hears me. I'm not even really sure what direction it's coming from. My eyesight blurs, then goes black [[(..........) ->final]]

(align:"=><=")[*Wicked Jefff He never put the toilet seat down after using the bathroom. Always visited your room but never closed the door behind him. Wicked, wicked Jeff.*] I woke up at a local clinic. My cat was safely in her carrier on the seat adjacent to me. It was black mold. I don't even have a roommate. Which means I'm behind rent. I'm simply going to have to kill my landlord at this point (align:"=><=")[ fin.] (align:"==>")+(box:"=XX=")[[[again? ->Home]] ]